Welcome to the master class where we’re going to talk about your vision and the obstacles that come up when you’re working on making your vision a reality. Sometimes you may feel like you’re doing everything right. You’re following self-help wisdom, the law of attraction and such, and you are saying affirmations and doing visualizations, and maybe you have a vision board, and you’re journaling, and you’re meditating, and you’re thinking positive thoughts, and you’re doing everything right, but your vision is not becoming a reality.
This is not to say that the law of attraction doesn’t work. It does, but there is something that is not really talked about in the teachings, traditional self-help teachings so much, is that state that we’re in when we are presenting our vision to the universe, so to say. There are two possible states that we can be in, and they are open and closed. What do I mean by that?
We can be closed in different ways. On the level of the mind, on the level of the body, and on the level of the behavior. Let’s look at these three ways. I want to make it very, very useful to you and applicable so that you can start implementing this in your life right away. The overall premise is that, you might have guessed, when we are closed, it’s not going to work for us. When we’re open, then we’re in the flow, and things become effortless.
There are three ways to know when we’re closed. On the level of the mind, the level of the body, and the level of behavior. Let’s say that I am having an argument with my husband, not that it has ever, ever happened. The reason why we are having an argument is because I know I’m right and he is wrong. Do you think that’s open or closed thinking? As long as I think I’m right and I think that he is wrong, there is no way out of this. When I work with people who are having problems in their relationships, I say to them, “You get to choose. You can either be right, or you can have a good relationship.” You cannot have both, so our commitment to the relationship needs to be greater than our commitment to being right.
Think about it for a moment. It’s scary. It’s really scary not to be right, because it takes a lot of vulnerability to step forward and just listen, lean in and listen, and not protect your point of view and not protect your ego. What is an ego? An ego is simply the way that we think about ourselves, who we think we are. We are much greater than what we think. This is the great irony of the ego, right? We’re so busy protecting who we think we are from getting hurt, getting offended, getting mistreated somehow. Whereas our true nature, our true abilities and capacities, and our true light are so much greater than the ego.
Oftentimes, these challenges come up to take down the defenses of the ego. That’s why people get on the journey of transformation, oftentimes, when they’re completely broken down. If you haven’t read a great book by Elizabeth Lesser … By the way, it’s called Broken Open … I highly recommend it. Elizabeth Lesser, Broken Open. Check it out. It’s full of these stories that you may recognize from your own life. The stories of going through depression, going through anxiety, going through addiction, or financial devastation, losing your job, or a health crisis. All of these devastating situations that help people get on the journey of discovering their true greatness beyond the ego, beyond that perceived idea that we think about ourselves that limits us so much.
The state when we’re enclosed in this thinking about how we are right and the other person is wrong, is an ego state, right? A closed state. As I said in the beginning, in the closed state, it’s not going to work. The law of attraction is not going to work. The manifestation is not going to work. We have to work and work and work on everything and not get the results that we need. Okay. That’s an example of how we can get closed on the level of the mind, when we’re caught up in our thinking and interpreting and we’re closed to other opinions, perspectives, etc.
If you look at what’s going on politically now … Overall, the climate that we have is very divisive, and what that means is that we are in this situation where people are protecting their own point of view and insisting that their point of view is correct and other points of view are not correct. This is an example of being closed on the level of the mind.
Again, change is not possible when we are closed.
It is not possible. What’s possible is combativeness.
On the level of the body, that’s very interesting, because we don’t typically pay attention to the body, unless it hurts, unless it gives us problems. We’re not naturally conditioned to pay attention to little things… I’m going to show you in a moment why it’s so important. You know that you’re closing on the level of the body when you hold muscle tension in a particular area. Everybody has their favorite areas, and you may know what yours are. For me, oftentimes it’s the shoulders. The tension starts building little by little, and I can feel my shoulders hiking up just a little bit when I’m feeling uncomfortable, when I’m feeling just a little bit outside of my comfort zone with something. Something is rubbing me the wrong way, or simply stress. If you’ve been following me for any length of time, you might have heard me define stress as resisting reality.
I’m resisting reality in some way with my shoulders, and over time, there’s a lot of tension that’s building up.
In addition to just the discomfort of this tension, why this is so good to observe is because when we are tensing up in the body, we’re also tensing up in the mind, and the behavior is going to follow as well. It all indicates the state of being closed. When we’re stressed out, the stress is showing up in the body, in the mind, or behavior. When we’re stressed out, we’re closed, and when we’re closed, we are closed to the guidance from the world, the life, the universe, God, however you want to think about that. Even not thinking about it esoterically, simply opinions and input from people and books and whatever comes our way. We need to be open. Working with the body tension will get you a long way toward relieving stress and being open. There are breathing exercises that we can do, and I’ll teach you these tools in the next video. I want this one to be more about the overall concept of what we’re doing here.
There are breathing techniques. There are stretching techniques, visualization techniques, progressive relaxation tense and release techniques for the muscles. Anything and everything that gets you to be more comfortable in your own physical body, in your skin.
Guess what, by the way? Being more comfortable in your skin, as you know, the expression stands for confidence. When you’re relaxed and comfortable in your body, it is guaranteed that you are also confident. Isn’t that interesting? We stress so much, and we’re working so hard on being confident and showing up in the world wearing all sorts of armor and confidence badges, whatever it takes, but the key is simply showing up open without any armor. Brene Brown popularized the notion of the power of vulnerability, it is indeed extremely powerful. The most radical, the most empowered stance you can have is being open.
On the level of behavior, that’s a very interesting one. It is in terms of being open versus being closed. When you’re open, you are led, you are guided every step of the way, and you have compassion for your own needs and other people. So there’s no way that you can do something that’s unkind to yourself or anybody else, or you can do something wrong that will hurt your own well-being or your business or anything else.
When we are closed on the level of behavior, examples of that would be… When we’re upset emotionally, what do we do typically? We escape somehow through the behavior. We can escape by overeating or over-drinking or over- you name it. Over-shopping, over-watching the TV. Getting into arguments. These are all signs of being closed on the level of behavior.
Basically, instead of being fully present in the moment … In the moment, right? In the present … and experiencing the great gifts of life in the moment, we resist it, and we use all these … I call them exit strategies. We use these exit strategies of what can then become real problems, real addictions. An addiction is simply something that we practice again and again to escape reality, to escape the present moment.
What you can start doing today, right now, to begin to align yourself with the wisdom of your life that is taking you by the hand and wants to give you everything that you need. Life is conspiring to give you everything that you need. Life wants to take you by the hand and take you right to your vision, because the world needs you.
It needs you to show up fully in your unconstricted, unrestricted, unfiltered light and glory with all your gifts that the world so desperately needs.
To get there very simply, very simply in theory, and not so simply in practice, you need to show up open. Open. When you’re open, life takes you by the hand and gives you everything you need. As we discussed today, a little summary.
You can track if you’re open or closed on the level of the mind, the level of the body, and the level of the behavior. Between now and next time we speak, first of all, I do want to hear your questions and thoughts about that, and also I want to challenge you to track how you are showing up in the world, if you’re showing up open or closed. That changes moment by moment, by the way, and it’s important to track that without any judgment.
This is not some kind of open police or law of attraction authority here with consequences. The only consequence is that in the moment, life either is hard or it is easy.
That, my dear, is regardless of the circumstances of your life, because I know that a lot of you have shared with me that the circumstances of your life may be difficult right now. Life is challenging you. Life is breaking you open. Life is creating conditions for you where you don’t have a choice but to go inside, to go deep and reclaim your true gift, reclaim your light. To do that, you need to start opening, to start collaborating with life, as opposed to resisting.
We think that we are doing good by resisting—the circumstances are adverse, so we need to resist. What will happen if instead of doing this (closing), you do this (opening)? What will happen if instead of thinking “My life sucks” again, waking up in the morning and thinking “How will I get through the day?” “I hate my job.” “There’s no money in my bank account.” “I’m in debt.” “I have all this extra weight.” “I’m single.” “My relationship sucks.” What happens if instead of this, being closed in the mind, you show up and you’re open in your mind, and you say “Thank you?” “I was able to open my eyes today. Thank you.” “I’m able to take a breath. Thank you.” “I’m able to move my body, to feed myself, to clothe myself. I have a roof over my head. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”
It’s not an intellectual thing. It’s really creating this feeling of gratitude, feeling of being taken care of. When you create that feeling of being taken care of, your body feels safe. It creates safety in your body, and that opens up your body, right? Again, going from closed to open. That opens your body, in addition to other exercises that you can do. I’ll share more with you in the next video.
Then the behavior, simply track when do you tend to run away from the present moment, and where you tend to go. Do you tend to go to food? Do you tend to go to drink? Do you tend to go to TV? Drown your sorrows that way? Or it may be over-shopping, or it may be sex, or it may be overworking. Yeah. That’s a productive thing to do, but you know the truth. You know if it keeps you from being fully present in your life, then it is an escape, an exit strategy. All right? My challenge to you is to very compassionately observe these three, being open and closed on the level of the mind, body, and behavior. You can keep a log that will inform you. First and foremost, do it with kindness and compassion and without judgment.
I hope to see questions and comments from you. You can email me. I am at firstname.lastname@example.org or you can leave me a comment here. I will get back to you. I will respond to your question, and I’ll probably integrate what it is that you’re asking me about, weave it into my next video on this topic of creating the abundant, fulfilling, and happy life that you were born for.
Thank you so much for being here with me today. Have a wonderful enjoyable day today, regardless of the circumstances. Lots of love.
Stay in your heart.